Oh, I know what I am.

"You know what you are?" Bill asks.

"You're an expatriate. Why don't you live in New York?...Nobody that ever left their own country ever wrote anything worth printing. Not even in the newspapers .... You're an expatriate. You've lost touch with the soil. You get precious. Fake European standards have ruined you. You drink yourself to death. You become obsessed by sex. You spend all your time talking, not working. You are an expatriate, see? You hang around cafes."

-Hemingway (The Sun Also Rises)